by Marcello (our guest guy writer)

Q: I am a single, very attractive, sane and balanced 40 year-old mother. I have married friends who have single male friends they want to set me up with but these men seem to get very freaked out by the thought of a set-up. They appear want to stay single (or do it their way?) rather than meet a woman their friends really think he’d dig. What’s up with that?
- Karen, Boise, ID

Dear Karen:
Set-ups can be intimidating, even amongst friends. In fact, I wonder if these guys are holding off simply because they don’t want to disappoint their friends in case it doesn’t work out. Such sensitivity has been known to exist in the male species.

In addition, it probably won’t surprise you to learn that some guys aren’t into dating women who have kids. If things progress beyond casual dating, that guy will also have to start a relationship with your children (and perhaps your ex, as well). Not everyone is ready for that many relationships right away.

It’s not all bad news, however. Why not suggest to your married friends that they invite you and these awesome single men to a party? They can make those vital introductions in a casual setting – and where both you and the guys are free to mingle with whomever you wish. It will seem less like a set-up, and more like a pressure-free meeting of (soon-to-be) mutual friends.

Oh, and one more suggestion for the marrieds: when they host the event, let you subtly play the star.

Have a question of your own to ask our guy? Send it to Marcello at [email protected]