Ask Alison

Ask Alison:

Hey Alison! Been keeping up with you, girl! So cool how many people and places you are charming with your sweet self. You are rockin’ it! Way to go. My oldest son is getting married in July, outside at a country club. It is a 4pm ceremony.
As you might recall, the ladies are large! I have dropped from a size 22 down to a 16 since I saw you last, but am still on the heavy side. What would you suggest? And what about a hat? I so appreciate any ideas!

-Becky, Keystone Heights, Fl

Answer:

Hey Becky,
Outside in July means there will be heat and humidity to deal with, especially if we’re talking about Florida. If indeed the country club is in Florida then I would suggest skipping the hat unless it’s lightweight, medium to wide brimmed raffia in a pale woven color. Then you can add a ribbon or flower of your choice to match with your dress. While we’re still letting thoughts of Kate and William dance in our heads remember that affair was held in a cool interior and most women dressed in conservative suits. The hats were fun, but most of the outfits were a bit dull. Most important is to choose the dress and you can think about a hat later since depending how long the ceremony runs it can lead to a hot, perspiring mess under the hat and flattened hair.

Ask Alison:

I need help finding a white bandeau to wear with a new maxi dress this summer.
-Laura (New York City)

Answer:

Laura,
So simple. If you feel your maxi is too low cut and you need a little coverage and perhaps some oomph of support try these simple, but still pretty bandeau tops. And you’ll avoid the uni-boob effect.

Thanks, Alison

DKNY Classic Beauty lace trimmed bandeau
Nordstrom.com, $28

White lace bandeau
Topshop.com, $26

Free People Scalloped lace bandeau
Zappos.com, $28

Barely There Bandini-this style comes in white and the straps easily hide next to the bandini.
BarelyThere.com, 2 for $26

Have a question for Ali? Send to: [email protected]

Ask Alison-Question: While I absolutely love my champagne colored wedding dress, it is a bit heavy and I’ve begun to wonder how I’m going to get through the day and night in it. I was so happy to find a beautiful and affordable dress, but do I sacrifice a night of dancing to still look pretty in my wedding dress? Any advice?
-Randi (Los Angeles)

Answer: Don’t fret! Haven’t you heard of a change of wardrobe? Celebrities do it all time for awards shows and performances so why not take a cue from their style page. I had my glorious Lloyd Klein couture gown for the wedding, the amazing photos and through the first dance and meal. THEN, it was time for the party to begin and I made a dress change. I had a short Valentino dress that was similar to my pink/peach wedding gown. This is not the time to throw on just any cocktail dress and definitely not an LBD. It would be ideal to continue the elegant look of your wedding with a dress that is within the same hues of your gown yet shorter, lighter and easier to move in, particularly for the dance floor. Have a beautiful day and hit the dance floor and cut the cake in one of these under $400 options, many of them I found through thefind.com.

Embroidered strapless flowing dress by Sue Wong-$368
Bloomingdales.com and SueWong.com

Embroidered mid-driff dress with organza petal skirt by Sue Wong-$388
Bloomingdales.com

Strapless chiffon dress by ABS-$330
Bloomingdales.com

Ivory Rosette Dress by Blush-$238
SimplyDresses.com

Lace strapless dress by Alecon, $280
Amazing-Wedding-Dress.com

A-line lace dress by Alecon, $279
Amazing-Wedding-Dress.com

Question: How can we tactfully encourage my daughter, Mary’s soon to be FMIL and SIL to have their hair & make-up done for photos & the wedding? They normally like “the natural look”. I have set up hairdresser and make-up to come to the bridal suite to specifically work on the close relatives. Also, how do I approach payment for themselves?
-Donna, NY

Alison: Awkward is right! First let me ease some of your concern by saying that the majority of posed wedding photos with family are full length which means that you won’t be able to see up close whether makeup is good or not. Instead it will just come across whether they are attractive or not. And that’s for others to judge. Also, when it comes to choosing photos that will be printed larger to be displayed in frames in your daughter’s home with her husband, I guarantee that besides one or two photos with family or bridesmaids/groomsmen the prints that she will choose will be her favorites of just her and her husband. You may end up choosing a few photos to display in your home as well, but again you’ll choose the prints that have you and your daughter looking best because let’s be honest-that’s what’s most important to you. As for all the photos that end up in the album, you and your daughter will look at it often once it’s completed, but after friends have seen it when they happen to be at the house, the excitement will die down and then it will be brought out just once in a while. Again, it’s the photos that are hung on the walls or in frames on display that will be seen and those will likely be just bride and groom.

So I hope that helps diminish some of the wedding stress.

Next is the phone call or face to face with the in-law members you’d like to get H & M done. The best way to approach these women is to join them in on the excitement of the wedding preparations. Example: “Hi Jane, we’re so excited about Mary’s upcoming wedding so she and I wanted to join you and your mom in on the beauty of that day. She and the bridesmaids are getting their H & M done and we were able to get a great deal on all of us getting similar treatment. I don’t know about you, but I’m no pro with a makeup brush so when they offered a deal to help us look good in the photos I thought it was a great idea. And I know Mary wants us all to join in on the glamour part of the day. The H & M team quoted me a price of $$ per person. I wish I could pay for all of us and I know that H & M can be pricey, but we’d love for you to be with us when we’re all getting ready. A true girl, ok some of older broads, bonding experience. I’ll bring the champagne and we can sip the bubbly while we get ready.

Donna, while you want everyone to look fabulous, this invite you offer to the in-law ladies should focus on the bonding time while prepping and the glamour that we all don’t get a chance to partake in regularly. If they say yes, you must include them in the group experience or else you face backlash of the having them feel like the ugly stepsister.

So what happens if they balk at the price? You’re next step is with grace and tact to let them know you’d like to pay half the price to have them be a part of it. (And that means more money out of your pocket.) You can’t pressure them to pay or get H & M done if they don’t want to do it. And nobody wants an uncomfortable wedding day. And while you may not care what they say behind your back it will be tense if you pressure them. So if they say no, then with a smile say, “We’ll miss you and your mom behind the scenes, but look forward to us all looking fabulous for the photos.” I’m sure they’ll get the hint and hopefully take a little more time getting ready for Mary’s wedding.

Making Plans

by Marcello (our guest guy writer)

Q: I’ve been dating this guy for about a month – and every time we make arrangements to get together he asks me what I want to do or where we should go. Why is he asking me all the time? Call me old-fashioned, but I think a man should know what he wants to do and where to take me. Am I crazy?
- Mary, Coldwell, NJ

A: From the tone of your question, Mary, I’m wondering if he isn’t a bit intimidated. I should think that if he were the one who asked you out in the first place, he would have had an idea of what he wanted to do on the first date. Did you reject his ideas out of turn?

There’s nothing wrong with a man wanting to inquire what you might like to do or eat – especially if you don’t know each other. If, however, after a few dates he continually defers to you to make the call he’s either:
a. concerned you won’t like his choices
b. a wimp
c. both

If you like him, despite his lack of creative input, take a moment to ask him about it. Tell him that you would like to hear his thoughts on the matter – and that you will agree to join him. You never know…perhaps he’s been sitting on a vast wellspring of activities – and now that you have made it clear you’re willing to hear them – a flood of exciting possibilities will be unleashed onto your calendar(s).

Have a question of your own to ask our guy? Send it to Marcello at [email protected]

Need a fix? An emergency fashion fix, I mean. It happens to all of us at one time or another. You’re running to meeting and you snag your hose. Or you’re at a party when you notice your shirt button about to pop off. It seems like wardrobe malfunctions always occur at the most inconvenient times from fallen hems to stuck zippers. I’ve got tips for solving your own fashion emergencies and what you’ll need in you own at home kit or items to toss in your bag.

Makeup Stains
Quick - find a baby! Okay, so you can’t hold someone’s baby the whole night to cover up a makeup stain. But you can use baby wipes to remove or reduce makeup stains on clothing. They also come in handy for removing lint from clothing and dirt from shoes.

Deodorant Marks on Clothes
You pull on your favorite little black dress, slip on your stilettos, grab your clutch and head for the door. A last look in the mirror reveals white marks on your dress. No time to change. Instead grab a handy Gap-Pal sponge and wipe away the chalky stain. Find it on, Gal-Pal.com. What you don’t want to do is rub it with a paper towel or a wet cloth.

Fallen Hems
For a make-do hem in a hurry, use short pieces of masking tape or duct tape to fix a fallen hem. Lighting professionals and musicians usually use duct tape or gaffer’s tape for their equipment, so locating some at an event shouldn’t be tough to do. And you can always keep these products from Bristols6.com and Hemmingmyway.com for creating quick hems on your jeans and pants.

Panty Hose Runs
A small run in your panty hose can soon develop into a full-fledged tear. Use clear nail polish to stop a run in its tracks. Hair spray is another good short-term solution.

Falling Bra Straps or the Uncomfortable “headlights”
There’s nothing more annoying than having to keep pulling up your bra straps. Double-sided tape can fix that problem in a hurry. Get yourself a handy little box from Hollywoodfashiontape.com. Use a small safety pin to fix a broken bra strap.

From headlights when wearing a sheer bra or no bra turn to the silicone covers that companies like Fashion Forms.com and Bristols6.com make. They lightly stick on, are completely comfortable, can be worn multiple times and immediately a woman’s confidence rather than trying to hide.

Stuck Zipper
Stuck zippers can be a real nuisance. Try rubbing a bar of soap or a wax candle onto the problem area. With a little manipulation, the zipper should come unstuck.

Loose Buttons/Fraying Button Threads
A loose button can quickly turn into a missing button. Dab the top of the button with a little clear nail polish to prevent it from completely falling off.

Sweater Snags
Step away from the snag with your hands up. However tempting it may be, do not cut or pull the snag, for it will result in an unraveled mess. Instead, take the tip of a closed pen or even a safety pin (just don’t stick yourself), and push the snag back through the inside of the sweater. Knot the snag on the inside of the sweater and help secure it with a dab of clear nail polish.

Pilling Sweater
Don’t just stand there pulling lint of yourself like a monkey! Rub a piece of Velcro along the pilled fabric to remove those unattractive balls. No Velcro? Get a fabric shaver or sweater comb on TheFind.com.

Ready to Make the Big Leap?

by Marcello (our guest guy writer)

Q. What are some sure fire signs that a guy is ready to take the big leap into living together or even marriage?
- Vicky, Warren, MI

A. If you’re at the stage in a relationship where you’re regularly picking his underwear off the floor, he’s probably already living with you, which is a sure fire sign that you should start asking for rent money.

Moving on to marriage, if he brings up the subject in the positive – the guy is ready – very ready. Does he fix stuff in the house? That’s good. Does he actually remodel it? Even better. Does he voluntarily attend open houses, take you to housewares stores or consult your calendar before making plans? These are all solid gold signs of nesting behavior in the male species. You may now declare open season on marriage discussions. If, however, you observe such behavior in your boyfriend, yet he’s still reticent to talk marriage, he is either:

1. already well into the buying-you-a-ring/planning-where-he’ll-propose stage

2. already married to someone else

3. still dealing with his mommy issues

Don’t worry, it’s probably reason #1.

Hosiery Uncertainty

Question:

Ok - Since you are the style guru…what is your take on pantyhose? I am going to my nephew’s bar mitzvah in October in Atlanta…my legs are less than perfect! Can I wear them or is that a real fashion no-no!
Thanks! Steph

Alison:
While I too don’t have perfect gams, I personally would resist wearing hosiery in October in Atlanta. And certainly you can get away with no hose if your dress or skirt hits around your knees. If you would feel more comfortable in hosiery, which I totally understand-my girlfriend in Florida won’t wear a dress without them even if it’s 95 degrees-THEN wear black sheer hosiery. It’s always so hard to match up skin tone to pantyhose and it will only age you by several years if you can easily tell you’re wearing them, so go with the black and it will cover you up better.

In a style quandry?
Send your question for Ali to [email protected].

Go Ahead and Cut It

by Marcello (our guest guy writer)

Q. I really want to cut off my hair, but my boyfriend loves it long. Why are guys obsessed with long hair? And, how can I convince him that I’ll still look cute with a pixie do?
- Lady Godiva, Irvine, CA

A. Clearly your boyfriend is no Hemingway. Yes, the legendary man’s man was crazy for women with short hair, and he often encouraged his long-haired ladies to cut it all off. I dated several women who did the same, and they all found the change empowering. Perhaps this is what disturbs some men…when their woman shears her long locks, she sheds one of the most classic identifiers of femininity and becomes…a boy?

Nonsense. When a woman gets a pixie cut – it emphasizes her face, her eyes, her neck and even her body. Do you remember Jamie Lee Curtis in True Lies? (wow!) No wonder so many women find a short cut empowering – and it sounds like you’re ready for the transformation.

I’m guessing you’ve already shown him photos of famous short-haired beauties such as Rihanna, Halle Berry, Jean Seberg (see above photo) and, of course, Louise Brooks. He’s still not convinced? Then there’s probably only one way to prove it – and that’s to go ahead and cut it. Do it. Prove him wrong and please yourself.

Bra Fit Issues

Question: I just watched you on ABC talking about getting a great fit with your bras. I am having a difficult time finding anyone to help me. I am an older woman..74 this coming September. My husband passed away 5 1/2 years ago in a few months after his passing I lost 100pounds. My problem is bras. I was fitted not too long ago and was told I am a 36 C or B. I have size 38 and they feel snug. I just purchased three Bali bras size 38 C and they too feel snug around my body and the cups too large with some puckering. I am going to try a 40 B. Any help would be great?
Sincerely,
Donna

Alison: First off, each bra style can fit differently. Are you trying the same style or are you trying different bra styles? Here are some of my thoughts on styles: If you’re concerned about the shape of your breasts, you should definitely try a light foam cup. A compressed foam bra will not add any size but will give you a nice even, rounded shape.

Have a question for Alison? Email [email protected]